My niece Isabelle is leaving for Argentina, and I don’t know how I’m going to stand it. Isabelle is an adult, although I don’t know how that is possible, because I remember clearly the day she was born, on an extraordinarily cold day 22 years ago, and surely, I can’t be that old. I arrived at the hospital with a bouquet of flowers and a Mylar balloon that had gone flat because it could not stay inflated at below-zero temperatures. But Isabelle thrived.
President Trump is testing restraints on his power to hire and fire, which is worth doing in many cases but raises hard questions in others. Consider his maneuvers to retain Alina Habba as New Jersey’s top federal prosecutor, despite the Senate’s refusal to hold a vote on confirming her. Last week a federal judge said Habba has acted “without lawful authority” since July 1.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently started budgeting after realizing how much money slips through my fingers each month, especially on little treats like coffee runs, lunches out and takeout. When I added it all up, I was shocked at how much I’ve been spending without even realizing it. I know I need to be smarter with my money so I can save for my future goals, like building an emergency fund, paying off debt and eventually buying a home. The problem is that every time I try to cut back, I feel deprived. I don’t want to live a life where I never treat myself, and honestly, those small indulgences bring me joy in the moment. Still, I can’t shake the guilt that comes after spending on things I don’t technically need. How do I strike a healthy balance between being financially responsible and still enjoying the present without feeling like I’m constantly punishing myself ? I want to develop better habits that last in the long term, but I’m afraid of slipping back into old spending patterns. Sometimes I wonder if I’m just not disciplined enough to manage my money the way I should. – Strategic Planning DEAR STRATEGIC PLANNING: Look at your monthly income and expenses. Figure out how much it’s possible to save if you allow yourself one indulgence per month. Then turn your cost-savings approach into something pleasurable for yourself. You can use a cute coffee carafe to transport your home-brewed coffee to work, making it feel like a treat. Pack a lunch that you prepare the night before. Prepare something you enjoy eating, so you aren’t depriving yourself even though it comes from home. Continue thinking like this: What can you do to celebrate yourself AND save money?
Dear Doctors: At about 26 years old, my father became sick and lost all of his hair. Not only did he lose hair on his head, he had no eyebrows, eyelashes or beard and even lost the hair on his arms and legs. Do you have any idea what might have caused that?
DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year now, and for the most part, things have been going really well.
In 1945, British forces ended Japan’s occupation of Hong Kong.
CLINTON’S HISTORY 10, 20, 30 AND 40 YEARS AGO
Dear Doctors: I’m puzzled by people whose doctors diagnose a problem but write to you to answer their questions. I believe you publish these questions and your answers to educate your readers. But might there be a way to present them without making those who ask them look foolish for not asking their own doctors first?
The Democratic National Committee is holding its summer meeting in Minneapolis.
DEAR HARRIETTE: My younger brother got married last year. This is his first marriage, and he’s in his 50s. In some ways, I think getting married later can be a bit easier: You know what you want, you know your boundaries and you are likely more established (professionally and financially). I think in some ways that rang true for my brother, but I think after they made things official, his wife has shown him different sides of herself. She moved into my brother’s longtime home when they got married and is now requesting that he purchase something new with more space – despite having two spare bedrooms in their current home. She works fulltime but does not want to contribute to any bills. My brother seems somber. He’ll talk to me about the pressure sometimes, but he tries his best not to express anger or resentment. He’d been planning for early retirement but is now reworking his plans to stay in the workforce a bit longer. How can I support my brother as he tries to handle this new pressure gracefully? – Sister-in-Law DEAR SISTER-IN-LAW: While marriage does require compromise, not every requirement or request has to be honored.